Getting Real

Getting Real for a moment:
When I write, I share my heart with you, whoever and wherever you all are, my real feelings for my real life events. But I’ve noticed I tend to encourage and preach a bit more than I am real with how I feel. So this time, none of that, just my thoughts and feelings about job loss.

Lately, I’ve been floundering. I’ve allowed the stress of needing a job to deter me from my need of Jesus and His Word. I haven’t been reading my bible or praying. I’ve mostly just been sitting and thinking. (Which is why I’ve not been writing)

As I was talking to one of the guys at the prison last week about needing a job, he corrected me, saying: “Jesus is our provider, not a job.” And he was right. Somewhere along the way I switched to needing a job rather than needing Jesus.

I have been going back to Chapter 6 of Matthew, because He says Not To Worry for what we need, which I feel great comfort in, such as: food and clothing. Then He adds: v.33 “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”

Humanly, I think: we don’t eat, we die, right? If we don’t have clothes we walk around naked, and get arrested for indecent exposure… (kind of like the commercials) so to avoid getting arrested for indecent exposure – seek first His kingdom! 🙂

It’s hard and scary. Out of work, the pressures of the bills and mortgage weighing down…it’s hard. It’s easy to start applying worldly thoughts and attitudes to the situation rather than God’s. It’s scary how big the problem looks compared to God.

But, in my heart I know Jesus is there. The fear, the pressure, the doubts and yet I do feel trust and peace. Holy Spirit has been playing worship songs in my mind and heart, and I even sing to the Lord songs never written. He is in the midst of this. He is in the midst of me.

So, what will I do? I’m going to take and apply v.33 as a promise – that, as I take my eyes and attention off the problem and set them back on Jesus, “all these things shall be added unto you”.

Is that easy? Nope. I will have to deny my desire to worry, deny the fear, and will have to deliberately turn my eyes to Him.

I ask for your prayers, and I extend an ear and prayers to any one of you who are out of work, or would be in need. We need to lift each other up, because we aren’t able to be strong all the time on our own. We need each other.


2 thoughts on “Getting Real

  1. Amy…great post. I think people appreciate when we “get real” as we share our struggles. Like the psalmist, we always end up rejoicing though in the promises and provision of God. We do need each other. We are sisters and I am praying for you. Love you.
    May it be well with your soul as you continue to see God provide for every need. Jobs come and go, but Jesus never will. His resources never fail.

    1. So true! Thank you Glenda, I appreciate your prayer support. It touched my heart to hear that a couple of the prisoners were specifically coming together to pray for me to get a job also. 🙂 God is good!

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